Saying goodbye to a possibility. And a bath.

2 years, 7 months, 2 weeks, 6 days since we said goodbye. I just woke up this morning feeling like crap. I think I had a dream last night that I had a miscarriage. I’m not pregnant and have never had a miscarriage so I don’t know where that came from. But now I’m feeling really shitty.
On mothers day I watched the twins memorial video and cried. And then felt like those tears were a betrayal to Liat- even though I know it’s not true. What a sucky feeling.
Either way, I think my mood today is also maybe related to the fact that I’m having a yard sale on Sunday to get rid of stuff, and I’ve decided to sell all the baby stuff I used for my daughters because we’re “done”… I already gave away almost all their outgrown clothing. For some reason, more than anything, the idea of getting rid of the baby bath is freaking me out. The baby bath. A $20 piece of plastic. I don’t know what that’s about.

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Love & Muchness, Tova


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