I don’t remember ever lighting a candle for them on October 15, pregnancy and infant loss remembrance day. I light these two tea lights on Fridays, when I light for the sabbath and we say their names. In truth, I don’t feel so connected to October 15 for whatever reason… But then, “days” like mothers or Father’s Day, even birthdays, aren’t something I am used to making a big deal about. But the wave of light passing through my FB feed inspired me. This is my community. This is something I’m a part of. This is something that’s a part of me.
I light these candles not to remember. I don’t need candles to remember. I light them to thank my girls for all the beauty, blessings, strength, light and sparkle they taught me to see in my world. And I light them to thank all of the beautiful baby loss mammas who’ve traveled this journey with me. Whether in supporting me in my darkest moments or allowing me to attempt to support them in theirs. ???