It’s 12:22 on Saturday night and I’ve been working and working and working- and I still have a lot of work ahead of me, but I just finished something big and wanted to give myself a little pat on the back before moving onto the next thing I gotta work on. I logged on to FB for my “fix” but just wasn’t feeling it. The fact is, I just felt a need to connect with you. The people who really know The Muchness and signed up to hear from me.
About 5 minutes ago I put the final touches on the free Mother’s Day Muchness after Babyloss Challenge. As I scheduled that final email to send, confirmed all the raffle dates and blog posts were properly set up, I felt a rush of pride and anticipation and just wanted to jump up and down and give someone a hug.
But everyone around here is asleep, so I’m reaching out for a virtual one instead, I guess.
While the message of The Muchness is without a doubt for anyone who resonates with the idea of losing their Muchness (and I have yet to meet someone who doesn’t,) I’ve been wanting to create a program for loss moms for a while and feel really proud that I finally am. This Mother’s Day Challenge is a pre-curser to a more intense and personal Muchness After Babyloss Program that will follow. (I’ll tell you more about that in the upcoming weeks.)
Connecting with Dr. Julie Bindeman, a psychologist and 3x loss mom who works with families coping with loss and complicated family planning in her day-to-day practice was a real gift. It gave me the courage, framework, and accountability- to take what I know from my own experience and share it in a way that I know can help people. On top of that, being able to combine the message of Muchness which is such a heart-centric thing, with clinical data and her years of professional and personal experience around this subject has been incredible.
Ya know, there’s always reasons to be afraid. Always reasons not to do what your heart is calling you to do. Always.
But if there is something your heart is truly calling you to do, please know- there are also so, so many reasons to do it.
Sometimes those reasons are intangible, illogical or other people will think you are bananas.
Do it anyway.
I was terrified to create a program for loss moms. Despite years and years of connecting with other moms who’d had losses, despite being one of them, I was (am) still scared. I know that there is so much we struggle with, issues so real and painful, the idea that anything I say, no matter how glitter coated and sincere, may help is still hard to fathom. And it’s scary for me to put myself out there like this. But it’s what I feel called to do. And despite (or because of?) the fear, it feels pretty good. 🙂
When I left my job 20 months ago, I was also terrified. Although people congratulated me – said it was so brave, the truth is, staying there terrified me even more. Having more of those stupid panic attacks under office tables terrified me even more. Some may say brave. Others (particularly those related to me) may say stupid. I believe, at that point, I had no choice.
And so here we are. There are days I panic, but I don’t have panic attacks. Because this road, though bumpy and uncertain, is the right road, one way or another.
I hope you are on your right, albeit bumpy road. And if you know you’re not, I hope you find your way to it…. scratch that. I know you will.
Thanks for hanging out with me while I continue to figure this whole thing out, and if you are a loss mom and want to join me, Dr. Julie and over 650 women (so far) that have signed up for this challenge, you can do that and share it with others who can benefit right here. 🙂