The strange pull of what you really love…

I haven’t blogged in so long. So long I think I may have forgotten who I’m speaking to, and thinking that might not be such a bad thing…
But anyhow…
I’m sitting in the car with 10 minutes to kill until my pottery class starts.
Turns out when 2014 decided it was old news, 2015 entered with a bang. I’ve realized how much of 2014 was simply swallowed up in stress and Muchlessness.
Part of it, of course, is that I was so busy building Earseeds that I really wasn’t very In Touch With The Much- but also it was just choices. Adjustments. Mental exercises and painful growth spurts that we all sometimes find ourselves navigating.

So here I am, making small decisions every day to refind my Muchness. I’ve started by getting my hands dirty.
Literally.

20150120-195147.jpg
(Turns out they recommend taking off your wedding ring before sculpting an edamame bowl. Yeah. Edamame.

This is my life

Today at my in laws my kids were doing this perler bead art with my nephew.

20141123-174638.jpg

When they were done my sister in law told him (he’s 9) to carry it carefully to the car and she’d iron it when they got home (about a 3-5 minute car drive.)
They’ve done it many times before and “she hadn’t let him down yet.” (Her response when he asked if it would work.)
I was incredulous.
We could barely get from the table to the countertop without the beads falling all over the damn place.
So I pulled out the scotch tape and covered my kids masterpieces so I could iron them when we got home. (I long ago adopted my in laws iron for crafts- I’m not sure they are aware of where it disappeared to.)
Despite my careful taping, and demanding to hold them, this disaster happened before we even got to the car:

20141123-174108.jpg

…disappointment once again.
He skipped to the car while holding his miraculous piece of perler bead magic while mine cried and the injustice.

I almost couldn’t blame them.

Cliff jumping.

They say that living starts at the end of your comfort zone.
I’ve been exploring my art lately- starting with the clay, moving towards the fashion, and now, I’ve done something that actually kind of frightens me and is WAY out of my comfort zone…
Behold, 36 inches squared of stark white intimidation:

20141018-171834.jpg
I have a very clear vision of what I want to create on it, and I even have a spot in someone else’s beautiful home where it will hang.
Excited to bring this canvas to life…
I’ve never done art like this before.
#findingmymuchness

Goodbye Mr. Fish

I told them not to leave us their two fish to fishsit while they were out of town. I told them “were not pet people, are you sure there’s no one else?” I asked them what they’d tell their kids if they returned home in two weeks and one was dead.

I thought I was (mostly) joking.

5 days later we flushed the bigger one, but not after taking a picture of him so his dad could replace him without their two year old catching on.

Sad that I can’t even fishsit without being reminded that whether it’s fish or plants or babies- I simply can’t seem to manage to keep two alive simultaneously.

Yes, I know that’s morbid.

Stupid fish.

20141012-103105.jpg

It’s all a matter of perspective

I’ve been wasting a lot of time playing this game app called Flow. The point of the game is to create paths between the same letters and fill every square of the grid with paths.
So you start with this:

20141006-110753.jpg
And end up with this:

20141006-110824.jpg
I like it because it fulfills the OCD desire I have to fill in spaces and organize small areas. My four year old also likes it, and is surprisingly good at it.
As you do better and better the grid gets smaller and more letters are added.
You start to get the hang of it, the rhythm of where the paths “want” to go… Wrapping around the edges, taking the long way around the other letters.
It feels good when you can see that the “obvious” path isn’t actually the correct path, and taking an unexpected turn will get you where you wanna go.
And with each puzzle completed I get a teeny tiny feeling of “yes! I can figure shit out- either in this silly game or in the game of life or business.”
And I know this analogy sorta sounds like a reach but it’s true- I totally get that feeling.
But then, every so often, I’ll get stumped. I’ll get a board that seems obvious, or even not so obvious, and yet I can’t figure it out. Here’s one of those boards:

20141006-111625.jpg
It shouldn’t have been so complicated, yet every time I did it I ended up here:

20141006-111710.jpg
Or some place similar.
Was driving me batty.
I know the answer is possible- I know it’s staring me I the face, but I can’t see it.
So I put the phone down and come back to it later.
But inevitably, I still can’t get it.
And then I remember the trick that always works.
I turn the phone upside down, squint my eyes so the backwards letters (aka:the details) don’t confuse me from the larger task at hand, and almost immediately I’m able to solve the puzzle.

20141006-112203.jpg
Ta-da!!

I don’t know why each time this happens it takes me a while to remember this trick- that it basically always works- but that just seems to be the way I learn. Slowly.

Just like the game feels like a very elementary analogy for life, this always reminds my that sometimes you just have to step back, take a bathroom break, and come at life’s challenges from a new perspective. While squinting. And confident the answer is there, just waiting to be seen.

Just to note: you can’t advance to higher levels without passing each board. If you wanna keep playing you just keep redoing the same boards you already did time and time before. Which sometimes is good, but not really the way to keep yourself truly interested in the game.
… Am I taking this too far? Well, whatever. Take from it what you will.

That video I promised you!

So, while away for my nieces Bat Mitzvah I still needed to “show up” for the fashion design class I’m teaching. I made them this lil’ resume video, so I thought I’d share it with you!

Tova Portfolio style video… from Tova Gold on Vimeo.

I’ve also, for the first time since 1996 picked up some colored pencils and actually started drawing again… Here are some things that fell out of me that I truly didn’t know I was able to do:

10672262_711514868914623_853576112973602374_n 10672353_711852405547536_7461008178583007373_n

This whole experience has reminded me about so many of the things I’ve accomplished in my life- so many of the talents I’d forgotten I have, and passions I didn’t know still ignited me. It gave me an idea for a new project that I am REALLY excited to get started with…. I’ll keep you posted!!

Have an amazing week!

xo,

Tova

The hardest interview of my life.

Yesterday, I went on the hardest interview of my life. Ironic, considering I already had the job.

This semester I’m gonna be teaching a fashion design bootcamp to a group of 6th-8th graders at one of the local schools. While I’ve taught art to kids before, it was always as a “visiting artist” and the primary teacher was there to keep the kids in line. This time it was all on me, and let me tell you, if I was feeling the need to tap into my grit, this’ll be it. This Muchness journey I’m on…. taking me to all kinds of unexpected places…..

Let me first say, I am SO EXCITED to to do this. I LOVE teaching. (who knew?) When I was working as an art director in the fashion industry I always had to hire recent graduates and teach them and there was nothing better than watching that spark of understanding come to their eyes and the pride that came from looking at something you created that you didn’t know how to create just a little while ago.

I can see that most of the kids in the class are so eager to soak up the info I have to share… and the ones who talked a lot and distracted everyone else, I plan to win them over as well. 😀

So, for some reason I was MORE nervous about this class than I was about some of the talks I’ve given to rooms full of adults. I couldn’t figure out why, until I got there, but here’s the thing- when you talk in front of a room full of adults, they WANT To hear what you have to say. They WANT to absorb it, or they wouldn’t be there. So they sit in their seats and silently wish you luck and welcome you.

These kids, they were gonna make me earn it. They asked me to recite my resume. They wanted a detailed description of what we were going to cover in the class, what products I make, where they are sold. I’m pretty sure they’re gonna check my credentials— I wonder which have googled me and are reading this right. now.

I kinda loved it. Hold my feet to the fire, try to sneak out for too many bathroom breaks….. that’s OK…. keep me on my toes, that’ll be just fine.

At the end of class I briefly pulled out a bit of my portfolio that I brought to show them “just in case” I ran out of stuff to talk about and the craziest thing happened…. rather than run for the door when the bell rang, they were huddled around looking at the pictures with more interest than I’d seen during the the entire class. That gave me an idea….

Next week I can’t be there. I’ll be traveling for my nieces Bat Mitzvah. (Don’t think this is an opportunity to rob my glitter palace…. someone will be home!!!)

I was planning to record a lesson via video and have them do it while I’m gone, but I decided instead to make the video about ME! One of the kids in the class told me I “talk like a YouTuber” – whatever that means—- I kinda feel like it could be a compliment. (Like, I’m animated, yo!)

So I just spent some time in my basement taking pictures of my fashion portfolio from College…. and I even found some drawings from my very first portfolio which I started in 6th grade after going to a Bob Mackie fashion show.

Here are some of my 6th or 7th grade fashion sketches:

6th-grade 6th-grade2 6th-grade3

I’ll share the video I create for their class once it’s complete… then you’ll get to see all kindsa Pre-Muchness Muchness that lived in the mind of the self-proclaimed Muchness Queen.

It’s funny to look back with some adult perspective on what you did as a kid and think “damn…. if that was my kind I’d be like “girl, you are talented.” and not feel braggy about it. Makes me wanna reach as high as I want my kids to reach someday.

Incidentally, after leaving the classroom, I walked through the lunchroom where there messages were stenciled onto the wall:

photo-2 photo-3 photo-1

Very Muchness Indeed. 

Oreo Charms, Muchness Craft Time!

Two days ago Molly told me that on Monday after school she wanted to make charms. “Quick-n-easy” charms she said, as though this was something we’d done before. (we haven’t) and I immediately thought of  a great little video I saw on YouTube when I was binge watching polymer clay tutorials a few weeks back.

So we made them! Quick-n-easy… and a whole lotta fun too!

Step 1: 

Buy mini oreos. (big one’s’ll work too but those’ll be some mighty large charms- maybe a key chain??)

1

Step 2:

Find a nice, cleanly molded cookie. A lot of them have crumbles or broken edges. Dust away the crumbs and pull apart your oreo. Eat the cream and not as pretty half. Cover the pretty half in clear nail polish.
(You’ll notice mine is covered in color-changing teal nail polish. I’m really bad at following directions.)

2

Step 3:

Cover the dried, pretty half of an oreo with glue gun glue. Do this on a piece of parchment paper so it doesn’t stick to the table.

3 4

Step 4:

When the glue is warm and solid but before it cools fully, pop the cookie out of the mold. If you wait too long the cookie will stick and if you do it too soon you’ll burn your fingers or distort the mold.

5

6 7

Step 5:

Make oreo colored clay. (mine is a mix of black + red + this weird mustard color that was mixed scraps left over from a different project.)

8

Step 6:

Make a ball and shove it into all the nooks and crannies (I know, that is a Thomas’ English Muffin reference. It’s like I’m making a carb salad.) Then cut the excess and carefully remove the clay cookie from the mold.

9 10

Step 7:

Do that twice.

Step 8:

Look through your random jewelry findings box and select parts that would be appropriate for a charm. If you don’t have such a box, just find a precious piece of heirloom jewelry somewhere in your house and disassemble it for parts. Sandwich jewelry findings between layers.

11

Step 9:

Roll some white clay to make the stuffing. Flatten your ball. Make a sandwich.

12

Step 10:

Bake it.

13

Step 11:

Line them up with a bunch of real oreos and make people guess which are which. ….and GO!

15

Step 12:

Blog about it.